is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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