Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
only you would photoshop your dick
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I'm bleeding and have questions
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize