Ambien. No doubt about it.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
