I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
