who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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