she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
