I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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