Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
