Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
