I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
This is my gift to your gina
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize