Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize
