You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
