Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize
