I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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