You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Blow job season was short but glorious.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
