I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
