i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
