well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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