Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
