Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
