Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
