Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
they need to just BURY HIM!
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just had sex on a roof
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
