why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
