No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
