All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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