i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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