okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Randomize
