I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
