Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
No subtext here. People are naked.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
