so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
