dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
