u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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