This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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