Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
