tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
