just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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