so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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