omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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