I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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