why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
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