What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
zippers are such a cool invention
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize