i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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