dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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