I don't think brook has ever known best
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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