did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
