You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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