he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
