remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
