just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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