Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
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