Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
